Shortage of Barber’s Antiseptic Liquid Bugs Town Drunk

An anticipated shortage of the blue antiseptic liquid used by barbers worldwide to sanitize their equipment is anticipated sometime this week in Duluth. Local barber Gus Tolfson, a town drunk, is concerned.

“When I run out of liquor, I always know I’ve got that blue antiseptic liquid I can drink. It’s great stuff – it really puts me over the top. Everyone knows that a barber can’t cut hair unless he’s properly motivated. Well, I need my liquid motivation. I don’t know what I’ll do without it.”

Experts at the University of Wisconsin have repeatedly stated that there are good substitutes out there for sanitizing combs, scissors, and razor blades. That’s not good enough for Tolfson.

“It’s got a real sweet taste, and as long as I’m sure to take the combs out of the jar before I drink it, I don’t mind using it at all. It’s the best way to get my fix.”

A shipment of blue antiseptic liquid is expected to arrive in Duluth by February 9th. In the meantime, it is suggested that local barbers use Vodka of 80 proof or greater to sanitize their equipment.