Big and Hairy

You can say there's no such thing as Sasquatch, but as for Dabnis Brickey, he believes. The local university student claims he can offer proof that Sasquatch, or perhaps Big Foot, inhabits the woods of northern Minnesota. "I was just going for a stroll along Moogie's Lake and there he was across the water, in all his Sasquatch glory!" says Brickey, a graduate student in the Earth Science program at Fon Du Lac Tribal and Community University. "He was about 10 or 11 feet tall, with a dark auburn coat and opposable thumbs. He made a glorious roar when he spotted me, then dashed back into the clove of birch trees." A little further down Sheridan Drive, Brickey found small bits of chicken wire and sealant foam, a discovery which he claims is ample evidence of the "monster." "I sense there may be more than one of this beautiful beast," says Brickey. "I really believe we can peacefully co-exist in the Northland." Brickey is also the author of "We Need A Few More Rednecks: The Techtonic Relocation of Appalachia."